What An OL Needs To Succeed

Readers write in constantly and ask me if they should go to law school. While I always appreciate mail from readers, this question drives me insane. My blog is called The Jobless Juris Doctor; I rarely say anything positive about the legal profession. Do you really have to ask?

However, there are two questions you should be asking yourself. I believe the answers to these two questions are what determine whether or not you have what it takes to succeed as a lawyer.

The first is: Was your LSAT score above 165? If not, you’re not getting into a decent law school. No, it’s not fair, but that’s how it is. Without a high LSAT, you go to a toilet. Employers do not hire from toilets in this economy. You will not get to practice the law you are dreaming of. It’s like a person who is 5’2” trying to get into the NBA. Maybe Shorty has a lot of heart, maybe he wants it more than the 6’5” guy, but it’s not going to happen.

You need a certain personality to be a lawyer, and it’s not nice people who make the best lawyers. So the second question is: Are you both street smart and snarky? It’s not enough to be snarky; you have to be smart about it. A Smart Snark is someone who can defend a murderer, mislead a jury without them realizing they’ve been manipulated, know that they guy he just got off will probably go out and kill again, and still get a good night’s sleep.

Someone who is snarky, but not street smart, won’t make it. Take my ex-friend SS (Stupid Snark). SS hadn’t talked to me in years, and she’d let me down the last time I had contact with her, so she had to know I was still pissed. She recently moved back to NY and heard that I had graduated from law school. Figuring I would have some contacts for her, she sent me an email about her recently deceased dog.

Anyone who reads this blog knows I am a major animal lover, and she was trying to suck me back in. She immediately began trying to “work” me on the first call. I let her know that I had no contacts for her, and the disappointment in her voice came across loud and clear. Never heard from her again. Stupid Snark, no one likes being manipulated and if they catch you doing it, game over.

If you have a high LSAT score, no conscience, and the ability to manipulate others without them realizing they are being used (Smart Snark), then by all means, go to law school.

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